Static

I simply hate this hangover.....the plan was to just sit at home and surf all day. But the moment one of my friends gave a call to have a momo fiesta ....I knew it was not going to be the same. And come on Life!....I don't even do the hard drinks...it was just a little more than a couple of beers come on...... I know I am having Sinus infection...thats why I just cannot afford to have anything cold or anything for that matter that would worsen the infection. I better go to the doctor and just killl the damn bacteria.....what an ass.....

So I am not completely myself today....all thanks to the spining head...but I must thank my computer for being so generous to let me have this oppurtunity to blow away. Technically, I'm in a very static position as I will be doing nothing much today....but then why am I writing this one...aa...well.....I was jst going through Natalie Portman's writings and...just realized ...that its been perhaps more than weeks that I have been keeping myself far away from all that is happening not neccesarily around me but certainly that I am connected to.

The current happenings of my country sadens me the most. And theres so much I want to do. Infact the circumstances even urge me to quit my job. Leave everything behind go back home for good. and just be able to do what I could do to the best of my abilities.

And whatever Natalie had mentioned in her article is exactly what I believed in and still do. I thought it was some kind of sign for me to pay attention again, look back and not just wonder but do something about it.

She said something like - It's not worth living if you don't feel that you can change something.

And I so totally agree. I feel its important for people to know their own worth including others. Also try to understand the worth of their own doings. its easy to miscalculate and lead everything to ruin. But to have that guts to make a choice that leads to a better tomorrow is perhaps the toughest. But thats what makes the everyday life worth living.

She's been associated with FINCA (Foundation for International Community Assistance) for quite sometime. An organization that helps women to be self-reliant all over the world, supporting them to start their own business to earn their own bread and butter.

And what I also found out today - that Natalie Portman originally hailed from Israel. That was interesting to know.

One particular phrase that she had mentioned ..that I would like to jot down here is "It's impossible to know the outcome of anything: You have no idea whether the life you impact will go on to bring peace to the Middle East or will go blow up a building. All you can do is act with the best intention and have faith."

And I have that faith in me too that one day things will change for better and I know for sure I will be a part of that change.

At the end all that I have to say is; words can change the way you think or the way you perceive things. And how you originate these words are through the experiences of ones own life. Natalie went through that phase and something must have had urged her to express what she was working on and eventually let people be accquainted with it.

So there's certainly no conclusion to what I'm writing I do hope and pray for things to get better. It takes years to maneuver the country back to its normal state from the one going through the conflict. For me it has become a matter of patience, a matter of lets-see-what-happens. And once again as I head home (pretty soon) I don't expect any miracle to occur right away but sure will be the change agent working on to bring back the lost smiles in all the Nepalese faces.

We'll see where it goes..........